In October in recognition of Breast Cancer Awareness I will post a daily blog with a reflection about breast cancer. The reflections will stem from something in the play. (All quoted lines are text from the play.)
Day 18: Being Alone. “I never lived alone in my life, have I told you that before?” is the line in the show. It is still true today, I have never lived alone in my life. "I went from living at home until I almost finished college and then getting married and living with Susan.” So one of the truths I was facing in 2000 was the possibility – probability -- that I would for the first time in my life be living alone. I tended to get up early Sunday mornings and just walk around the house with Susan asleep upstairs. It was a lonely time for me as I wondered “what it is going to be like being alone.” When you love someone I have come to understand and you have been together a long time you develop a symbiosis. Your essences or life force become entwined. We become each another half of the other, entwined as a single whole but yet also ourselves. I wrote a poem about this Awareness called US. What happens then when one-half of your own essence may disappear? What is it going to be like not just “living alone” -- I travel and I actually have “lived” or been away from Susan for travel a lot over the years – but “being alone.” Losing the other half of your whole? I now know from talking to a lot of people who have lost the loves of their lives that this is one of the hardest parts of the “Dance.” Learning how to be alone . . . not with the love in your life present in the world. It is a change in “being.”
Stat of the Day: Approximately 12.3 percent of women will be diagnosed with breast cancer at some point during their lifetime according to the National Cancer Institute.
Task of the Day: Take a man to lunch. If you know a man whose wife has breast cancer take him to lunch. It is a lonely journey and most men are going to be reluctant to talk. The task is for both men and women. A man might be more likely to open up to a woman friend than a male, though at the end of the day just reach out and take a man with breast cancer in his family (wife or mother or sister etc.) to lunch.
Resource of the Day: The impact of Breast Cancer on men can be beautifully told. Here are some places to go to experience their Awareness. The Battle We Didn’t Chose No One Said It Would Be Easy Breast Cancer Husband